


Memoriam Oblivione

by Pureblood_Slytherin



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Awkward Romance, Dubious Consent, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-08-17 05:21:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16510133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pureblood_Slytherin/pseuds/Pureblood_Slytherin
Summary: Crix Madine has a cunning plan, he wants to convince Thrawn that he is part of the Rebel Alliance. Leia doesn't like the idea but is forced to play along. Of course, things do not go as planned...





	1. Nothing

**A/N:** Not the best idea I've ever had, but I thought I might give it a try.

This was a stupid idea.  
Leia looked at the unconscious blue body in front of her.  
Stupid! Reckless...  
Crix Madine obviously hadn't served under Grand Admiral Thrawn before he had defected to the Alliance, otherwise, he would have known that thinking they could outsmart Thrawn was presumptuous at best.  
That man was a living legend.  
Doctor McAllister lifted his syringe.  
"Are you sure about this?"  
Mothma, Madine, Rieekan, Ackbar and herself were silent for a while.  
"I still think this is a bad idea." Leia said, vocalizing her doubts once more. "We should kill him." Leia felt almost bad for saying it, but the destruction of Alderaan and Han's ordeal had hardened her. This was war and Thrawn was her enemy. Leia shook her head. "Or we could try to sell him to the Empire, they would pay good money for him or arrange a prisoner exchange... I just have a bad feeling about this."  
Mon Mother sighed.  
"Leia, we have been through this before and we have made a decision. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity."  
Yes, it was. But she doubted it would work. Thrawn would never help them. No matter what they did to him because he was the worst of all enemies. Too intelligent to follow blindly, too complex to fight for money or glory. He believed in the Empire. He lived and breathed the Empire.  
"Please do it, Doctor." Mothma said finally.  
Doctor McAllister injected the fine needle into his veins and shortly after the Chiss' eyes fluttered opened and glowed in an ominous red.

To their surprise, he remained silent and just studied his surroundings.  
"Hello. I'm Doctor Hebert McAllister, are you feeling alright?" He handed him a glass of water, which the Chiss accepted, but he only took a small sip, even though his throat must be arching after such a long time in stasis. He was very cautious.  
"I am." He put the glass down on the nightstand. "Thank you, Doctor."  
His voice was fascinating. Dark and velvety and firm at the same time. Leia had heard it in recordings of course, but this was quite different. He eyed them carefully. Like a predator in a zoo sometimes eyed the visitors. _You might think you_ are save _, but you are not._ Oh yes, he was dangerous.  
Stupid idea...  
Either the serum didn't work or he just acted cool to not give away his disadvantage. If the serum didn't work on a Chiss, they were better off shooting him right here.

"How do you feel?" The doctor tried again.  
"Like I was in stasis for over a week."  
McAllister forced a smile on his face.  
"Actually you were. You had an accident and we had no other choice as to put you in stasis. What is the last thing you remember?"  
He eyed the group in front of him once more.  
"That is the question is it not?"  
Silence filled the room.  
He was avoiding the question. The serum had worked.

"The accident has severely compromised my memory, Doctor." He finally said. "Subconsciously, and on a very basic level, I remember a lot. For instance, I would know how to use the blaster that the .... General..." His eyes met Mardine's "... thought fit to bring along, but besides that, there is nothing."  
"What about your name? Do you remember your name?"  
"Nothing, Doctor."

TBC


	2. A matter of trust

_Three days later - Morning - Canteen of the capital Mon Calamari cruiser_

Leia looked at the blue figure in line at the cashier.  
Ceetan. She still couldn't believe it. That was the fake name the had decided on for Thrawn. The afternoon would have been hilarious if it hadn't been so serious. How to re-name a person whose name had installed nothing but fear for years? One suggestion had been worse than the other. At one point Madine had put the crew list on the table, had looked under every pod and in every book for a good name and NOTHING had worked. Thrawn was Thrawn. Ceetan had been the best from all the bad ideas and had come from and old Indian lore book that Mon Mothma had conjured up in the end. In their defense, time had not been on their side and they couldn't possibly name him Thrawn and then hope he would never find out how to use the Holonet!  
_Stupid plan. Stupid, stupid plan._  
And they had other things to worry about! Han Solo, the man she loved had been frozen in carbonite by Darth Vader and was now lost! Boba Fett had promised to bring him to Jabba's Palace, but he had never arrived there. They had to rescue Han and not waste their time on a plan that was doomed to fail.

Madine and Rieekan, were spending a lot of time with Thrawn and apparently had demoted him to Commander. Probably gave them the thrill of their lives...  
As far as she knew, Thrawn had his own quarters now and they were very keen on telling him all about their enemy "The Empire."  
_Stupid plan._

Suddenly, she noticed Thrawn coming over.  
_Speak of the devil and he shall appear..._  
"May I?"  
"What do you want?" Leia asked and it turned out a lot harsher than intended. She was not in the mood the talk to him. He was the reason they weren't looking for Han. He didn't deserve their attention. The only thing he deserved was a blaster bold in the head.  
"I want to plan my escape." He explained flatly and said down opposite of her, without waiting for permission.  
"I have to disable the tractor beam, kill a few people, steal a ship and then get out of here. It is quite simple really."  
"What?" _Was he joking or was he telling the truth?_  
"It is so easy that I decided to raise the bar a bit and take the beautiful Princess along. Otherwise, it would not be half as impressive."  
He bit into an apple and calmly studied her face.  
"Obviously, you lost more than your memories," Leia replied sharply. "At least your pick up line was a bit more creative than "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen"."  
"Only because "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen" wouldn't mean much in my case."  
Leia actually laughed. "Well, that's true."  
Finally, she sighed and looked at him. Out of his Imperial Uniform, he looked almost likable. Black suited him... Thankfully, they hadn't put him in a Rebell uniform. That really would have been too much.  
He studied her. Those red eyes missed nothing. What did he really want?...  
"What are you working on?" The Chiss asked all of a sudden and nodded at the datapad.  
"This?" Leia paused for a second. Probably it was best not to lie too much to the Chiss. After all, professional liars were good at spotting others. "A friend of mine is in trouble. He was frozen in carbonate and is on his way to Jabba the Hut."  
Thrawn raised an eyebrow.  
"An unorthodox method. What did he do?"  
"He got in the way of Darth Vader." He was silent for a while.  
"Does that name ring a bell?"  
"For a moment I thought it did. But no. Who is that?"  
"He is the Emperor's henchman and enforcer. A Sith Lord and the embodiment of evil."  
"There is no such thing. Sentient beings have one thing in common - free will. Thus, we all have the capability of good and evil. What we do with it, is largely based on our surroundings and what we deem necessary or right or justifiable. Most people have reasons for what they do and those are seldom sardonic in nature. And if we take this line of thought a bit further, it also raises the question of how somebody can be called "good" if he or she never had the chance to be evil? Things are seldom as simple as some people may want us to believe."  
Interesting...to hear that from him. But it was even scarier to see how the serum worked. There was all that brilliance and no real memory. A miracle. A dark miracle. This plan was not just stupid it was also morally wrong. They tried to use Thrawn against his own beliefs and obviously, the Alliance was not above it if it meant winning the war. Maybe Thrawn was right and the line between good and bad was a fine one. Or it wasn't. He was an Imperial Officer. The loss of his memory didn't change the core of his being. Imperials had their own view on what was right and wrong.  
"Vader tortured me. He stood by when they destroyed my home planet. For me, he is pure evil."  
"My apologies. I was not aware of that."  
Leia shook her head. "It doesn't matter." She looked over to Rieekan and Mardine who were eyeing them curiously. They obviously did not like it...  
"And what did those two tell you?"  
"To look at some data and maps. They say I am a strategist and that they need my help."  
"And?"  
"I refused, of course." _Of course..._  
"Because you don't trust them?"  
"Trust is a hard thing to bestow, Princess and one I would not recommend." He smiled at her and took a sip of coffee. "Especially when it comes to Humans. You enjoy hurting others. Such enjoyment is ingrained in all of us to a certain degree, but Humans are an especially vicious bunch, otherwise you would not have spread so far."  
"So you trust no one?"  
"I cannot answer that question, but I guess that I trust very few people or better that I have little faith in them."  
"I am not surprised."  
"I have noticed." He smiled again. "Which makes me trust you more. At least more than the others. And you ARE the most beautiful woman I have ever seen."

TBC

 **A/N:** I never imagined it would be so hard to write Thrawn out of his normal surroundings. It takes at least twice as long to write this ff. And the first version of this chapter was a true comedy! It always tends to glide to the funny side of things. Really weird!


	3. Tests

***

The Mon Calamari cruiser moved slowly through the Yost System and its sensors were continuously looking out for Imperial ships and space mines, which were scattered between the asteroids, protecting shipyard 24. The "Liberty" and the "Home One" escorted Ackbar's flagship and mirrored its scanning methods.

Launching strikes against smaller Imperial shipyards might look crazy from the outside, especially after the operation of Hoth in which the Rebel Fleet had been decimated quite a bit, but it was their only chance if they wanted to level the playing field a bit again. Grimly, Ackbar remembered that day... General Veers and Admiral Piett had done a rather good job there. He could only hope that half their warrior's fortune would shine on him today, as the odds were clearly stacked against them.

His large eyes rested on Thrawn. The Chiss had refused to help them and putting a blaster against his brilliant head probably wouldn't help either. Still, he wanted him on the bridge. Maybe he would change his mind and if not, it would still be interesting to see his reactions, if he were to show any. So far the Chiss had been as cold and unreal as his home planet.

Admiral Ackbar looked around, into the faces of his officers. There was a good chance they might not survive ... Still, they had to try this. For the Alliance, for the galaxy.

"Sir, our long-range scanners detected something." Commander Link reported as she examined the data on her computer screens.  
"What do we have?" General Madine asked while walking over to her station, before glancing down on her display.  
"It looks like a Star Destroy and two Frigates securing the shipyard," the young Commander replied, analyzing the data. "There is also a squadron of TIEs on patrol, heading towards our destination."  
Admiral Ackbar carefully studied the data that she had sent over to his hovering command chair. Then he looked over to the com.  
"Are they aware of our presence yet?"  
"No, Sir. I'm not picking up any communications that would suggest that," Lieutenant Griese said, listening to the communication channels.

"Very well," Ackbar said. "Let's show them that our fleet is not as badly hurt as they think. Launch the X-fighters at my command. Now!"  
Commander Link nodded and pressed the corresponding button.  
"The X-fighter squadrons blue and red have been launched."  
"They will detect us at any moment," Mardine said quietly and looked, as in trance, at the battle's holo-display on the bridge's center. Showing their ships in green and the enemy-vessels in red.  
Suddenly, an alarm went off, and the lights were dimmed.  
"We have been detected, Sir. TIEs approaching and they are activating their subspace communications." Link commented warningly.  
"Jam their communications," Ackbar said and Link quickly entered the according command.  
"That won't hide us for long." Madine said darkly.

The holo-projection showed tiny explosions as the X-fighters destroyed the first TIEs. Suddenly, one of the Frigates came in with a micro-jump and hit them on their side. One of their ion cannons hitting them directly. The ship shook violently and red warning lights appeared everywhere on the bridge's control boards.  
"We have several small hull breaches and electrical fires on several decks. But the shields took most of the blast."  
Madine swore under his breath. _Damnit!_

"We are still fully operational," Ackbar explained in an attempt to calm down the crew.  
"Launch another squadron and focus on the Star Destroyer this time."  
Link did and the holo-projection gave reason to hope for a moment and then suddenly....

"Two more Star Destroyers!" Riekan screamed from the side.  
"Where the heck did they come from?!" Madine yelled and eyed Thrawn angrily.  
"Did you know this would happen?" He left the projection and went over to the Chiss.  
"I do not think I ever possessed the ability to look into the future, General." He said calmly. "And I did lose my memory."  
Madine did not look too happy with his answer.  
"There must be something left in that brain of yours."  
"As I told you, I have no control about what I remember and when I remember and I also have no intention of taking sides in a war I know nothing about."  
Mardine glared at him. "Die impartially then."

Thrawn looked at the tactical display and then calmly said: "Retreat."  
"Into the Asteroid belt? Filled with Imperial mines?" Rieekan asked bewildered  
"Yes, General. Into the asteroid belt."  
"Are you trying to kill us?" Mardine asked provocatively.  
"Obviously, you would not need my help for that." Thrawn said drily, while Ackbar just stared at him.  
This was crazy, but this was also very much Thrawn if the reports were to be believed. And he didn't have an alternative.

"Alright, Commander Ceetan. Let's do it your way." Ackbar pushed a button. "All ships retreat into the asteroid field. I repeat all ships retreat into the asteroid field."  
"Ten kilometres," Thrawn said.  
"For ten kilometres," Ackbar added.  
They did and watched the larger ships regroup while the TIEs followed them, suddenly spreading further to avoid getting hit by the asteroids.

"Commander Link, please monitor the Imperial command codes and record the second they are switching, which should be in approximately two minutes."  
Link looked over to Ackbar.  
"Do as he says."

"Got it." She said almost exactly two minutes later. By now the whole bridge crew had gotten unusually quiet.  
"Very good. Lieutenant Kreye, enter the fastest hyperspace course to whatever destination you deem save and transmit the coordinates to our escort ships." The Chiss ordered quietly  
"Done."  
"Good." Two blue fingers hit the side of a tactical display rhythmically.  
"Please send the previously recorded command code back to all TIEs within range. Do it at precisely the same frequency, but with and underline broad-band jamming....Now."  
Commander Link pressed the corresponding buttons.  
"The frequency has been transmitted."  
"Thank you, Commander." The Chiss let out a sigh. "Let us leave this dreadful place then, shall we?"

Madine looked at Ackbar, a very satisfied smile on his face.

***

**Same day, night, 01.10 hours, hanger bay 1, Mon Calamari cruiser**

"Where is your hairy friend?"  
Leia reached for her blaster, turned around and aimed at the two red eyes, looking at her from total darkness.  
"You!" She hissed. "What are you doing here?!"  
"I could ask you the same." He said and emerged from the dark.  
"I have a headache. Sleep is hard to come by."  
Finally, he stopped and looked right down at her. "And you?"

Leia still aimed with her blaster at him. Its end almost touching his chest.  
"I'm leaving to rescue Captain Solo, which nobody cares about anymore since your.... accident. So thank you very much. And you won't say a thing about this or I'll put a hole into your chest."  
"How very un-princess like of you." He smiled. "Put the gun down, Leia." He added a lot less friendly.  
"I did not allow you to call me by my first name."  
"Courtesy stopped the minute you pointed that blaster at me, girl." Then he reached for the blaster and unarmed her in a matter of seconds. Furiously, Leia tried to hit him, but he grabbed her arm, turned her around and easily locked her in a dura-steel embrace.  
"Let go of me!" The Princess hissed.  
"If you promise to behave." He said, before whispering into her ear. "Or I shall enjoy this a little longer."  
She tried to kick him again and he chuckled quietly.  
"And who would have thought that there is so much fire behind those brown eyes?"  
"Let go, or I will scream. Security will notice and they'll arrest you." Leia hissed and tried to free herself once more.  
"The security whose cameras you deactivated to steal a ship?"  
_Damnit!_  
"Let go!"  
"Will you behave?" He was certainly having fun. _Bastard!_  
"Yes, I'll behave...."  
He let her go and Leia almost jumped away and then turned around, angrily glaring at him.

"It was a mistake not bringing the Wookie along." He said finally. "Please explain to me why you left him."  
_Why did he want to know that?_ Leia shook her head.  
"Not that it is any for your business. But Chewie owes Han a life debt. That's a big thing for Wookies and Han's last wish was for Chewie to protect me. He would never let me go."  
"I see." Thrawn returned the blaster.  
"Going without the Wookie is a mistake though. You are brave and feisty, but still just a woman."  
"Are you always that charming?" Leia asked sharply.  
"It was not intended as an insult. I do like women. Very much so..." He smiled at her and Leia felt the wish to strangle him. "However, I do think that in combat they are at a disadvantage, as our little encounter here has just proven."

 _Where was he going with that? Had he tested her? Had he waited for her?_  
"Do you really have a headache?"  
"Yes, but I thought there was a good chance of meeting you here too."  
She had known it. _Damn that Chiss!_  
"So, your talk about escape wasn't just a chat-up line than?"  
"I see it finally dawns on you. No, it was not. I feel... let us say... uncomfortable here and you wish to leave in order to save Captain Solo from the notorious bounty hunter, Boba Fett - all alone, which, in my humble opinion, is reckless at best. So I guess we could help each other here."  
"Why don't you escape on your own?"  
"Even if I would manage to steal a ship, I do not possess the take-off codes that deactivate the ship's shield and flying through it is usually the last idea one ever has."  
That was true. Still, somehow she couldn't shake off the feeling that the lack of the take-off codes wouldn't have kept him here for long.  
"And you'll help me to save Han?"  
"Yes."  
"Why?"  
He shrugged. "You help me and I help you. Besides, I realized today that I have to leave as soon as possible, but what I haven't figured out yet is where to."

**TBC**

**A/N:** Thanks to Aequia who gave me inspiration for this chapter. :)


	4. Not easy, but doable

***

"I am sure you connect many wonderful memories with this Corellian freighter, but I would like to suggest a different, more suitable ship for this venture."  
Leia stopped and then looked back at Thrawn who still stood in the doorway.  
"But the Falcon is fast and has much firepower. Han did some tweaking there."  
The Chiss shrugged. "Tweaking only he and his co-pilot know about. In case of emergency, we won't have the time to figure out the correct wiring. And the ship is fairly old and too large for my liking. There is a far better choice further down this corridor."  
He nodded outside.  
Alright, he did have a point there. The Falcon was not the most reliable ship. Especially the hyperdrive had its problems and there were indeed many highly original modifications in the freighter.  
"What's the alternative?"  
"Come and see."

***

It was a small silver ship that looked a lot like the "J-type star skiff" from Nubia Star Drives, but it was a lot better equipped.  
"What is this?" Leia asked and was obviously fascinated by the beautiful, little ship.  
"A "Star Spike" from Cygnus Spaceworks. They didn't build a lot of them. Good ship but too expensive for the public market and of no use for the military. It is a bit older, of course. About 15 years, but still in good shape." He explained.  
"I like it." Leia eyed Thrawn. "Looks like someone did his homework. Do you have a key?"  
Wordlessly he handed her a silver cylinder.  
"She is all yours, Princess."

***

Thrawn and Leia sat down in the cockpit.  
"And what is our destination?" Thrawn asked, after activating the ship's main controls.  
"Lando said the Slave I has been spotted at a moon called Gall, circling Zhar, a gas giant in one of the far Rim Systems."  
Thrawn raised an eyebrow and slowly turned to Leia.  
"Are you telling me that your source is Lando Calrissian? The man who betrayed you to Lord Vader?"  
Leia sighed and sat back in the high-back, black chair. "Alright... I know what you must be thinking... I am mad to trust him after that. But in the end, he regretted his decision. He helped us to escape and gave up Bespin for us. We owe him."  
"Owe him?.... Leia, the man sold you to the Empire and I doubt that is a decision you make lightly. The only thing he regrets is that the deal did not work in his favour."  
Madine had said the same and she had hated Lando at first. But Luke had been all forgiving and even Chewie had been on his side. So she had played along, even if all her senses had told her otherwise...  
"We all make mistakes." She said finally. "And Luke trusts him."  
And Luke was a Jedi. He knew it when people lied. Poor Luke, after Bespin he hadn't been the same. Whatever had happened between him and Vader, had affected him deeply and now he had gone back to Dagobah for some soul-searching and to his teacher, Yoda. For a second she wished that she could switch them - "I offer an Imperial Grand Admiral with memory loss for a Jedi. Anyone?" Leia smiled at the idea and then said  
"Lando really regrets what he did and he is the only one looking for Han at the moment... Granted, the information is third-hand, but he said the informant-chain is fairly reliable."  
"My headache gets worse by the minute."  
Leia smiled at him. "That's how we work. You can still change your mind."  
"No thanks."  
"What do you know about Gall?" The Princess asked.  
"Nothing. Yet."  
He pushed a few buttons and put a slicer card into the main computer's side.  
“In theory, only the Empire can use the restricted part of the HoloNet; in practice, however, anybody with half a brain can slice into the basic level."  
He studied the screen.  
"It is an Imperial Enclave with two Star Destroyers, plus all the attendant TIE-fighters, of course. There are many good shipyards on Gall, if Fett's ship is on Gall, it's probably there for repairs considering the location.”  
Leia studied the charts.  
"That makes sense."  
"Not easy, but doable." They looked at each other for a second.  
"Gall it is then."

TBC


	5. Gall - Day 1

Gall - Day 1

"Didn't the information say that Gall had a cool climate?" Leia asked and put a water bottle against her head.  
"Yes, and that is true in general, but Fett chose a shipyard closer to the equator. It is usually warmer there." He paused a little.  
"It seems that my body does not like the heat either." He said finally, before opening his jacket and throwing it in a corner, leaving him in a standard black shirt. Leia had already changed into some lighter clothes herself and tried the weight of the backpack for the first time.

They had landed on a small beach, close to a typical tropical jungle, outside the city Lando had told them - far enough not to get spotted by the Imperials.  
"And how long do we have to walk through the jungle?"  
"I do not know, two days - maybe three."  
"THREE DAYS?!"  
"As I said, I do not know for sure, but Fett is not a fool."  
Damn it. Leia started to fear that this might have been a bad idea after all. Three days in a jungle with Thrawn!  
"Did the HoloNet say what kind of creatures live here?" Leia pointed a the jungle.  
"No, but I would assume the usual: snakes, crocodiles, larger canines, spiders and bats. Jaguars if we are very unlucky."

He handed her a blaster.  
"Do you know how to use this?"  
Leia smiled. "Of course I do."  
"Still. Show me."  
Leia released the safety catch, adjusted the blaster's strength and aimed.  
"What are you waiting for?"  
"You...you want me to...?"  
"Of course."  
Leia aimed at the small bush and fired, whereupon the bush turned in to a piece of burned mass.  
"Good."

He said, obviously satisfied and then handed her a first-aid kit.  
"You will need this."  
Leia put her bag down again and put the kit inside. Luckily, the small ship was well equipped, she doubted Han would have had all these things in the Falcon. Leia checked the bag: A first-aid kit, two water bottles, water purification tablets, ration-bars, sunscreen, water-proof binoculars with night vision, a knife, a torch, a cigarette lighter, a rain poncho and a sleeping back, of course.  
"Alright. I think we can go." Leia said thoughtfully.  
"Are you sure?"  
Leia nodded. Yes, she was sure. She had to save Han and with that Thrawn picked up a laser machete and walked towards the jungle.  
"Follow me then. And try not to fall too far behind."

***A couple hours later...***

Sweat streamed down her face and trickled down her back. Leia panted and swore, while steadily following the sound of the deadly curved light blade, that was mercilessly cutting a pass through the thick bamboo and with each chop, it felt like the vines got their revenge - crashing against her shoulders, scratching her arms and hands. This was a green hell, and apparently, it was determined to slow them down.  
It was hot and Leia was thirsty and her vision was blurry, from the wet air or from the sweat - she couldn't tell. Her legs hurt and she could hear her heart beating in her chest. This was so much harder than the survival training of the "Apprentice Legislature".

Suddenly, Thrawn stopped and when Leia had caught up with him, she looked up and then noticed the wild beauty of this place for the first time. They stood at a large gorge and looked down at a broad, crystal clear blue river, further away, on her left, she saw a magnificent waterfall. On the other side of the gorge were orange and lemon trees and some colourful alien trees that looked more like massive ferns. Quite a lot of the plants Leia had never seen before, but they were stunningly beautiful - it was a breathtaking sight: Everything shone in a vibrant green and there were bright, exotic flowers, monkeys and colourful birds screaming shrilly in the background. 

"This is so beautiful." She whispered. "And it reminds me of home."  
Thrawn looked at her and raised an eyebrow in question.  
"There was a jungle on Alderaan?"  
"No, there wasn't, but ...." She stopped, suddenly realizing what she was about to do. She hadn't talked about Alderaan since its destruction, as the pain had been too strong, and now, from all the people in the universe, she had almost talked about Alderaan with an Imperial Grand Admiral! This was crazy. Hiking together through a jungle didn't make them friends.  
"It, it just reminded me of ...." Leia trailed off and then quickly added. "It doesn't matter."

There was a pregnant pause. "We only have to follow the river upstream to Gallina now." Thrawn explained then.  
Leia nodded and was grateful for the short break, her body had been crying for for hours.  
"We have to find shelter. A cave would be perfect, otherwise look out for a protected, flat area. We have another hour of sunlight, perhaps less. And we need enough wood for a fire that will last the night." Leia nodded.  
"My thoughts exactly."  
Her feet hurt like crazy, but they kept marching on. Tomorrow morning all her muscles would be stiff and sore, she knew and dreaded it already.  
"There are snakes everywhere here." Leia said quietly.  
"Try to look on the positive side of things. They have plenty of protein and once roasted most of them taste like chicken."  
"How wonderful." Leia rolled her eyes.

Later on, Leia curled up in her sleeping bag and listened to the threatening part of the jungle: cries of unknown animals, growing louder in the dark. And it felt like someone was watching them - stalking them, Leia thought uncomfortably and it was still warm and humid. Leia stared at the fire and suddenly wished she hadn't gone but it was too late now. So far things had gone well. Perhaps too well. Usually, disaster was following her. They had found shelter, the fire was big enough to last the night and keep the animals away, it hadn't rained and even the ration-bars hadn't been too bad.  
Suddenly, she saw a shooting star crossing the sky. "That's a good omen" she said.  
"I hope you are right." Thrawn whispered from the other side of the fire and somehow Leia knew that his thoughts were somewhere else entirely.  
For the first time she thought about him, and not about her feet or Han. Why was he here? Had his headache disappeared? Was he starting to remember? Or was the opposite troubling him?  
"Are you alright?"  
"Of course.... Good night, Princess."

TBC

A/N: A bit short and boring. Still an update and they are in a jungle now.


	6. Gall - Day 2

***

When Leia got up, he was gone.  
_Where was he? Had he remembered and joined the Imperials? Leaving her all alone in the jungle?_  
Leia forced herself not to panic.  
_No, what sense would that make? If he wanted her dead, he would have killed her by now and if he wanted to re-join the Imperials, he could just have flown to the shipyard. Calm down, Leia._ She told herself.  
But still, she couldn't shake off the distrust. The fact that he had lost his memory did not change his sole, his character. He wasn’t one of them. Never would be, even if Madine refused to believe that. Not someone like Thrawn. He was too far in.  
Suddenly, she heard footsteps.

"Good morning." He poured some water into the pot, which hung over the fire, in order to decoct it.  
"You are an early riser," Leia said matter-of-factly.  
"A forced one."  
"What do you mean?" Leia reached into her backpack and took out a couple of ration bars.  
"Breakfast." She offered. He took the bar and set down next to her.  
"Thank you. I find sleep rather unpleasant at the moment. I have.... dreams. Very vivid dreams. Of faces I think I should know but do not. And of pain, death and suffering." He shook his head. "I am not sure what to make of them and they are getting worse."  
The serum was losing its power, the memories were trying to find their way back into his consciousness. They had to reach Fett soon.  
Leia smiled.  
"I am sure it will be better soon."

***

By the afternoon, their luck changed dramatically.  
It started to rain and everyone who has ever been in a jungle knows what that means: It rained and rained and rained. At first, the coolness of the rain had felt nice, but soon they were soaking wet, there was water in their shoes and the earth turned into mud. Leia was miserable and cursed at the rain and the mud and the cold.  
Soon after, walking became a torment. She sank into the mud and with each step it went into her shoes and had begun to irritate her skin. The rain came down in torrents and the Princess was barely able to see. The leaves were still crushing against her skin and every small obstacle became a death-trap. She fell several times and her hands were bruised in several places.  
"We have to get out of here!" Thrawn yelled over his shoulder. "Do you see that large tree over there?" He pointed north-west, to a tree about 200m from their current position.  
"We will not get a better shelter than that."  
Leia nodded. _Any_ shelter would do.  
"Ok."  
Suddenly, there were frogs everywhere. _Where had they come from?_ She crashed some under her feet and what in a different situation would have disgusted her, she couldn’t care less about at the moment. She just followed Thrawn, immersed in mud, without knowing what her feet would touch next. Wordlessly, she hit the mosquitoes, that, despite the rain, kept on tormenting her and time and again she fell over fallen trees and uprooted plants, her backpack got stuck in bushes, she bruised her legs against sharp rocks and bit down the pain. She crawled forward, got back up again and when she thought things couldn't get any worse, they did.

All of a sudden, the ground turned into a river of mud, knocking her off her feet, pulling her down.  
"Leia!" She heard a male voice, somewhere in the background, but didn't care. Mercilessly her body crashed against stones, wood and endless bamboo. _Where was she going?_ Leia remembered the large gorge. _Oh God, if the mud would pull her down the gorge she would die!_ She tried to hold on to something. Her fingernails broke and then she fell...  
Leia screamed with all her might. _Was this the gorge? Would she die now?!_

With a splash she hit water. It was dark and the mud was pulling her down. _Fight, Leia! Why was it so dark?_  
Leia swam. She didn't know where she was. _Was she swimming up or down? Or sideways? Force, help me! I don't want to die!_  
Her lungs were about to burst and - finally - air. _Oh, wonderful, precious air!_  
The rain still crashed down on her and to Leia’s horror, her hell-ride hadn't ended.  
"Leia!" She heard a voice from above.  
"I'm here!" She screamed but doubted that the noises of the water and rain would let her message carry far enough for Thrawn to hear.  
The raging river was carrying her downstream - fast and she didn't know where to. _Water rapids perhaps? Or another waterfall?_ Those were quite common in places like this.  
"Ahhhh!" Again she crashed against a stone and almost lost her consciousness, but then found that her backpack was stuck somewhere. _Thank the Force!_  
Leia turned around and tried to climb onto the rock. Slowly, and with her last strength, she pulled herself up and looked right at a crocodile.

Her backpack was still more or less stuck at some bark, all around her was a deadly, raging river and above her was a crocodile. Great! So far the beast hadn't noticed her. Maybe she could get up and then try to get to the shore. She couldn't hold on to the rock for much longer. There wasn't much choice… So she pulled herself up and .... slipped.  
Leia crashed back down, but her backpack held her in place. Slowly the large, solid animal turned around, approaching her.  
So that was it. The end of Princess Leia, eaten by a crocodile. It came closer, stared at her with its small, reptilian eyes and then growled, before opening its mouth, showing off its large, sharp teeth. It was a lot bigger than she had thought. Leia closed her eyes and then heard a shot.  
The large reptile collapsed above her on the stone and slowly glided down into the river, before floating down beside her. Leia looked to the shore. Thrawn. He had found her. Leia held onto her backpack, which was also slowly giving in. Then two strong blue hands pulled her up.

"You saved me." Leia stuttered, still in shock, her lips blue.  
"What did you expect me to do? Watch you being eaten by a crocodile?" He shook his head and a small smiled appeared on his face.  
"Are you alright?"  
"No." Leia answered truthfully. "Everything hurts."  
"As long as it hurts, you are still alive."  
He helped her to cross the river over some more stones, Leia hadn't noticed before. He was strangely optimistic. Wordlessly, she followed him back into the jungle.

"Why are we going back inside?"  
"I saw something while following you." His machete crashed through some bamboo again. "It should be here somewhere...."  
And then she saw it. A ship! A crash-landed ship! Leia ran forward. A shelter - from the cold and the rain. It had a roof! It was an old cargo freighter. There were already plants growing out of it. It had probably crash-landed decades ago. Thrawn took out his blaster and shot the lock open.

Inside it was packed with cargo boxes.  
"What do you think is inside?" Leia asked.  
"The ship was shot down by TIE-fighters, so I guess this was a smuggling ship. Therefore spice, alcohol or medicine are the most likely candidates." He opened one of the boxes and showed its content to Leia. It contained high priced alcohol from the Core.  
"How do you know the ship was shot down by TIEs?" Leia asked, apprehensively. Everything Imperial leaving his mouth made her suspicious. She just couldn't help it.  
"The laser holes in the ship’s hull. Typical TIE." He studied her.  
"You look terrible. You should rest. I will inspect the rest of the ship."

***

Having a fire inside a ship was a new, but her broken and wet body was thankful for it.  
Leia was covered in a blanket the Chiss had found somewhere and took another sip of the brandy while listening to the rain that was constantly hammering down on the ship’s hull.  
"Take off your shirt." He said while approaching her.  
"I beg your pardon?"  
"Your clothes are wet and your whole body is covered with bruises and at least two open wounds." He showed her the bacta cream in his hand. "Without it, you will not be able to continue the journey tomorrow."  
He was probably right. Still, undressing in front of a man in a situation like this was imprudent and naive. He could do whatever he wanted with her. They were all alone out here.  
"You think I will take advantage of the situation."  
"No!" Leia tried, but it didn't sound too believable, even in her ears. He threw her the bacta cream.  
"Do it yourself then."  
There was an uncomfortable silence, while Leia took off her shirt and trousers underneath the blanket.

"Why this lack of faith, Leia? Did I do anything to you in the past that explains your behaviour towards me?"  
"No." Leia started to treat the wounds on her arms. "No. I do not really know you. Maybe I'm not good in trusting and tend to see the worst in people."  
"Yet you trust Lando Calrissian? And your man of choice is smuggling illegal substances for a living?"  
Yes, her story didn't sound too believable…  
"Let’s just say that I’ve heard things about you that weren't too nice."  
"Things like I take advantage of women whenever I can? And happily watch them being eaten by large reptiles?"  
Leia shook her head and smiled.  
"No."  
"And the people who told you these stories about me knew me well?"  
"No, I wouldn't say so."  
He sighed, shook his head and then said something in a language she didn't understand.  
He was right. She wasn't treating him fairly. She knew nothing about Thrawn, the man. She only knew about his military campaigns and that he was the enemy.  
"I'm sorry", she said. "You saved my life today and I don't think I thanked you for that yet. Well, I am thankful ..." Leia looked down at the bacta cream. He deserved some trust.

"It would be nice if you could help me with the back."  
"So now you want my help?" He shook his head again.  
"Alright. Turn around."  
This time she obeyed and exposed her bruised back to him.  
She didn't like the way he ordered her around - like he had every right to do so. Or maybe he was just so used to it that it came naturally.  
His long fingers, slowly applied the bacta on her pale back, almost immediately soothing the pain. And once it was gone, her body soon warmed to his touch, to his strong male hands against her bare skin. Leia closed her eyes. It was strangely intimate and the reason she hadn't wanted this to begin with. She felt his thumbs slowly gliding down both sides of her backbone.... Her cheeks started to glow.  
Then his hands left.  
"That should do."  
"Thank you." She whispered quietly.

He went back to the other side of the fireplace while Leia carried on applying the substance to her legs and thighs.  
"How is the headache?" She inquired.  
"Still there and it gets worse after a flashback.... Today I remembered a fragment of a conversation with someone... I am not sure, but I think it was my brother."  
Leia had no idea he had a brother. She had never thought about his family before. Naturally, everyone had a family. Parents, sometimes siblings. They had taken that from him… Leia felt guilty even though she had been against it. It hadn’t been right.  
Silently she studied his profile, in which she saw the reflections of the dancing fire. Leia didn't really know what to talk about, but she wanted to talk. She was a politician and talk was her business, but on the other hand, what could she talk about? And all the really important topics were off limits. What a mess. Leia finished the bacta-treatment, lay down and looked out of the dirty windows. Rain. It was still raining…  
The rain had something hypnotic and soon Leia's eyelids became heavy and she drowsed off into a deep sleep.

***

When Leia woke up she was alone - again. And she felt a lot better. Bacta, what a wonderful thing. She grabbed her now dry clothes, got dressed and left the ship.

The rain had stopped.  
"Th..." Leia bit her lip. "Ceetan?"  
No answer.  
Carefully, she climbed down the still muddy hill, towards the river in which she had almost drowned yesterday.

And then she saw him, under the waterfall, naked. Leia closed her eyes and her first instinct was to turn her head and walk away, but her second, more primal instinct told her otherwise and so she opened them again. He stood with his back towards her, water raining down his undeniably attractive body.  
So far his cool and superior manner and the very fact that he was an Imperial officer - the enemy - had put her off enough not to feel any physical attraction for him.  
Until now.  
_Good heavens._ How could she not have noticed those muscles before? They were clearly defined and he looked like he was craved of stone. Like a lapis God.  
She should go - she really should, but could not. Captivated by the sight of the most gorgeous male body she had ever seen, Leia stared speechless at the stunning muscles on his back, his shoulders and his arms, which clenched and relaxed with every movement. And farther down, there was a rock-hard, tight ass and muscular thighs. Her pulse quickened and when he spread his legs apart, put his hands on his hips and with closed eyes titled his head back to feel the water on his face, she felt her mouth go dry.  
_GO, LEIA. NOW!_

TBC


	7. Gall - Day 3

A/N: _Here I sit in a train on my long way to Goslar. Some of my best chapters were written on train rides, so I hope that inspiration will be with me today. And what else can one possibly do on a lonely train-ride?_

Somehow Leia had managed to finally turn her head and walk away, but the memory kept on haunting her throughout the day. What if he had turned around and she had seen the rest of him and he had seen her! A nightmare. She couldn’t imagine the embarrassment. She probably would have stumbled and fallen right into the water; wet like a drowned mouse, looking up at his naked form. The idea alone was too much to bear.

It was a shame to leave their relatively save shelter, but the rain had stopped and they had a mission to fulfill.  
Leia packed her backpack and actually added one of the Brandy bottles to her equipment. You never knew when you could use it.

The hike through the jungle was just as terrible as it had been the day before. It was humid and hot and leaves were crushing into her face. They were following the river but on a higher up “trail”. It was exhausting. Every now and then they stopped and drank some water and her feet hurt, as the socks in her shoes were constantly slipping down so that she was walking on an uncomfortable bulge in her shoes.

“Oh, how I hate this!” Leia stopped and bend down to open her shoes. “It’s the third time and I….arrrr!” Thrawn’s laser machete missed her head by an inch only.  
“Have you lost your mind?!”  
And then she saw it. A large, yellow snake fell down a tree.  
“You can thank me later.” The Chiss said dryly and studied the dead animal.  
“A lemon viper. Quite deadly. Its venom paralyzes you piece by piece until your heart stops beating and we do not possess the antidote.”  
The snake’s severed head looked up at her, mouth still open. She hated the jungle. One of the reasons she had never left their basis on Yavin Four.  
“Thank you.” Leia whispered. The universe had to have a sense of humor. Saved by the enemy for the second time.

She still avoided eye contact.  
_Why? Did she think his glowing eyes would find_ proof _of her voyeuristic activities there?_  
It was childish, still, she couldn’t help it.

They kept on walking silently for the next two hours. The threatening beauty of the jungle all around them. Every now and then it seemed as the cries of the monkeys and parrots were growing louder, Leia thought uncomfortably. And the air was hotter than yesterday too, heavy and soft. Her skin was dump and her clothes felt like they were glued to her skin. It was disgusting. She needed a bath.  
"What are you thinking about?"  
"What?"  
"You had that look. The one that usually means you have decided on something."  
Leia ignored his irritatingly perceptive comment.  
"Nothing."

Finally, they reached a good clearing and Thrawn pointed to the floor.  
"We should stay here and you could cook some dinner."  
Leia laughed. "You may want to eat, but I cannot cook."  
"Why am I not surprised?” He put his backpack down. “You probably grew up with servants."  
"I did." _And she would not feel guilty for it! It was not like all women knew how to cook! Or should knew how to cook! They were not living in the dark ages anymore!_  
"If there is anything you can contribute to this adventure, let me know.” Thrawn said dryly and checked out their surroundings.  
Asshole! Yes, his presence had proven useful…. But….  
"Yes, feel free to tease me. And you ask me why I am not all nice and friendly towards you? Well, guess what? You are not the nicest person either!" Leia spat.  
He smiled.  
“I am sure I am not.”

He took out the binoculars, went over to an elevation and scanned the landscape.  
"I can see it. Gall. Two more hours from here."  
Leia ran over to him.  
"Really?" She reached for the binoculars. _Han! He was only two hours from here!_  
"Yes, I can see it too." She zoomed in as much as she could, but it was no use.  
"Tomorrow?" She asked and he nodded.  
“Yes, there are only two more hours of light left and I would prefer to engage by daytime and after resting.”  
"I agree. And I.... I need to take a shower or something similar. I smell terrible."  
"There was a waterfall close to our last resting place."  
"I know." Leia nearly bit her lip. Idiot!  
"Why did you not shower there then?"  
_Because the shower was occupied..... Don't blush!!!!_  
Leia quickly turned around.  
"Don't know.... I'll manage here."  
Then she headed towards the river.

***

When Leia returned, she saw him cutting some meat to pieces, before sticking them on green branches and pushing them into the ground, so that they were close to the fire.  
"What is that?" She asked suspiciously.  
"Tortoise and fish."  
"Did you.... KILL them?" Leia asked appalled.  
"Of course not. They just conveniently died." Thrawn answered sarcastically.  
What a terrible person. He had killed a tortoise! These creatures could become really, really old!  
"I am hungry and the idea of another ration bar was not very exciting."  
"I'm not hungry and, in case you missed it, there is fruit every now and then. This is a jungle!"  
He sighed.  
"I highly doubt that you're not hungry." He looked at Leia for a second. "If you are a vegetarian, now is the time to reconsider. The last couple of days have been exhausting. Mentally and physically. Meat is the only thing that will provide you with the necessary energy to feel relatively fit when we enter the city tomorrow."  
"I just can't."  
"Humans are omnivores, Leia. You can." There was a small pause, then he sighed. "Look, when you are deprived of food, it inevitably becomes all consuming - it is a logical survival instinct, but it impeaches your thinking. The other thing that a constant lack of food does, is it eats your moral, which is worse as it is not only caused by but also facilitates a lack of energy and that is something we cannot do without in a hostile environment like this. It would be foolish not to eat."  
He handed her a meat stick. "This should be finished."

Leia eyed the meat doubtfully. Bail and Breha Organa had raised her as a vegetarian. They had told her that it embodied a respect for life and it also reflected Alderaan’s peaceful policy. It smelled good and Leia was hungry, her body craved energy. Most humans ate meat. And surely her parents would have forgiven her in a situation like this. This would be an exception. Slowly, she blew on the meat to cool it down and then took a small bite.  
"This is.... pretty good. Not right, but good." Then she took the whole peace into her mouth.  
"Like so many things in life." He said ominously and smiled a little. “Welcome to the dark side.”

Leia ate so much her stomach ached. The unfamiliar jungle was unsettling, and, if nothing else, talking to Thrawn was a good way to pass the time and keep her mind off the dangers that were undoubtedly lurking in the dark.  
"Damn…. that was so much better than a ration bar. Does meat always taste that good?"  
"You were hungry and exhausted. So, the answer is probably no."  
The fire was happily crackling between them.  
_He was rather handsome in this light... And where had that thought come from?!_  
Leia shook her head. She should not engage in such thoughts. Two hours from Han. This jungle was driving her mad.  
"How did you know how to hunt?"  
"The term hunting feels somehow inappropriate. I just used the Blaster. Fishing I learned when I was very young.... At least I think so."  
“So…How are you doing?”  
He sighed and threw a stone, with which he had been playing so far, into the fire.  
“The headaches are gone, but the memories haven’t returned and I start to fear they never will.”  
“Would that be so bad?” Leia asked without thinking. Yes, the galaxy might be a better place for it, but naturally, he longed for his memories.  
“Yes, it would.” He answered more angrily than she had ever heard him. He wasn’t anywhere close to the angry volcano Leia turned into from time to time, but there was definite disapproval in his voice.  
“I do not know who I am. That must sound strange to you, but believe me it is not a good feeling.”  
Leia bit her lower lip.  
“I guess it’s not. I’m sorry.”

And she truly was. For not telling him. She could at least tell him his name. That might help, but that would also be dangerous. If he would remember, he would certainly not be happy about what the Rebellion had done to him.  
Still, he seemed to be a good guy deep down. A little too self-assured and arrogant perhaps and he liked ordering people around a bit too much. But all in all, she couldn’t understand why he had joined the Empire. But then again his whole life was missing. If one would take her memories - the loss of Alderaan, the torture, would she be able to join the Empire? Under the right circumstances? Maybe, she didn’t know….  
Leia sighed. She had made a decision. When they had Han… and were in save surroundings, she would tell him. She owed him that.

***

THE NEXT DAY

There it was: Gall. Leia could make out its buildings from at least 2km away. It wasn’t huge like Alderaa, but still, for a small Imperial enclave, it wasn’t too bad. High buildings in white, with fine decorative applications, spoke of a better time, but there were also high modern skyscrapers.  
“Welcome to Gall.” A huge sign said.  
The city was surrounded by an electrical wall that shimmered in a whitish blue. And there was only one entrance which was guarded by stroomtroopers that didn’t look too enthusiastic about their work. Gall was probably not the most desired station in their career. Most of the time they just waved people through, while they appeared more or less bored to Leia (but, admittedly, with stormtroopers such things were hard to tell).  
The princess looked around and then noticed some local farmers who, apparently, wanted to sell some of their goods inside town.  
“There.” She pointed to them. “We should join them.”

Luckily Leia was rather fluent in Sy Bisti and quickly they had a deal. She returned to the Chiss with two large, brown robes.  
“Put this on.”  
“What did they want in return?” He asked while covering himself with the “new” piece of cloth.  
“My blaster.”  
“A bad deal.”  
“Certainly, but I had planned to get myself a better one anyway.”  
The robes had long hoods attached to them and were big enough to hide their modern backpacks too.  
Then they joined the farmers on their old repulsor-speeders and the guards simply waved them through. So far so good.

Inside Gall it was busy. The streets were full of people, mostly humans but also some other species. There were street-food stalls at almost every corner and children were playing in the atriums of some larger buildings. It was different from what Leia was used to. More children, but it was easy to see that the people here were poorer than in the Core. You could see it in the way they dressed, their hairstyles, the way they talked and in the shops too. Yes, there were some nice shops - but all in all, the Rim felt closer here.

Thrawn was talking to an older man.  
“What are you doing?!” Leia hissed.  
“Finding out where the best repair shipyards are.” He said, took her arm and lead her into another, small street.  
“This way.”  
“How do you know?” He didn’t answer.  
Suddenly, the city changed into in Imperial fortes.  
“I think we have reached our destination.”  
Leia eyed the people on the streets.  
“We have to change.”  
Thrawn nodded.  
“They are all human.”  
“The Empire isn’t too fond of non-humans.” Leia explained. “But there are exceptions.” She pointed to a male Twi'lek in a typical olive green military uniform and there was a Zeltron in a black pilot uniform.  
She heard his sigh. “It is risky. The garrison is big enough that it offers some sort of anonymity and I would assume that larger Imperials ships dock every now and then too. Still, I will stand out. A stormtrooper uniform or anything with a helmet would be perfect.”  
Leia couldn’t agree more. There was also the chance that someone might recognize the Chiss. Granted, chances were low. He was too famous to be expected here and he would have a hard time finding a Grand Admiral’s uniform. Still, it was possible.

Suddenly, Leia noticed a road sign. “Imperial Laundry. We clean for Palpatine.”  
She couldn’t help grinning. She highly doubted that Palpatine had his laundry done here. But the thought was amusing.  
“Keep your head down and follow the road signs.”

Breaking into the laundry had been easy, but as it turned out, they only did regular officer uniforms.  
“For someone who is desperate to rescue the love of his life, you waste a lot of time finding the right uniform.”  
“I’m 1,55 meters! A blind person would notice that I stole the uniform if I simply took the first one!”  
“It has been _40 minutes_ …”  
“That’s nothing.” Leia finally turned around the corner. “Wait until you watch a woman getting ready for a state ball.”  
He smiled at her. “Really? General Leia Organa? Couldn’t you find an Admiral’s rank bar?” He reached into one of the larger boxes and replaced the rank bar with that of an ensign.  
“Nice. Your charm is really sweeping me of my feed.”  
To make the picture complete he put a tiny, green hat on her head.  
“Sweet.”  
“I’m not sweet! And the hat is terrible!”  
“If you say so.”  
Again he had that smug expression on his handsome face.  
He had disguised as a Commander. Probably because it mirrored the rank Madine had given him. It was just as laughable.

They kept in the shadows of the buildings and Leia kept her head down, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible. Nobody seemed to notice them and they easily entered the shipyard.  
Thrawn checked the first terminal.  
“The Slave 1 is in hangar 12. That is…” he paused for a second. “…down there.”

Naturally, it had been too easy. Something had to happen! In this case a guarded gate.  
“Ok, I distract the guard and you take him out.”  
“How cliché. I hope it is not your female charm you count on.”  
Her eyes turned to slits. “Just because I am not nice to you doesn’t mean I do not possess female charm. I can be _very_ charming.”  
Smilingly Leia turned around the corner and approached the guard. She could only hope that he was male, otherwise she would be in real trouble. But they almost always were.  
“Hi there. I have a problem and I hope you can help me. _Please_ …. It’s a bit embarrassing, but I think I lost my way.” Leia smiled sheepishly, fluttered her long, dark eyelashes and made a very cute, innocent face. Implying a silent ‘ Big, strong man, please help me.’ Her ensign-disguise was actually quite helpful too.  
The stormtooper hesitated for only a second and then took off his helmet.  
“Sure, Miss. I am here to help.”  
There was a damped sound and he went down.  
“No. You are here to guard.” Thrawn pulled the unconscious body into a broom-cupboard, locked it and threw the key away.  
“I would like to see how he explains that to his superior officer.” Leia joked; obviously pleased with her performance.

Inside hanger bay 12 it was pretty much empty, which was scary in its own way. Darker and quiet. Rarely they heard mouse droids carrying messages from station to station and every now and then machines welding or hammering. There were humans too, but very few.  
They were almost there.  
All of a sudden, Thrawn stopped and then looked at her in a strange way.  
“What’s wrong?”  
"Kiss me."  
It was the last thing Leia had expected to hear, but before she had time to react, he had already pushed her into the corner between a wall and a tower of olive green cargo boxes.  
"What are you doing?!"  
"Behind me. Eleven o'clock." He interrupted her unceremoniously and then Leia noticed them - two Imperial officers had entered their corridor and were heading towards them. Damn it! If they would check them or notice that they didn't belong here, chances were good they would join Han on his trip to Jabba.  
"Just pretend you like it." And with that, he pressed his lips to hers.  
_Did he really think that would work?! What…_  
Leia closed her eyes and felt her heartbeat quicken as Thrawn took control and quickly deepened the kiss. He flicked his tongue over her lips once and then imperiously pushed it into her mouth, sliding it provocatively against hers. The Princess' heart thudded loudly as he pressed her closer. She put her arms around his neck and then felt her breasts against his chest, his manhood against her belly... The pure thrill of it was beyond comprehension.  
Good heavens! She was kissing Thrawn! She was kissing an Imperial Grand Admiral, the enemy - and she liked it. Yes, there was no need for pretending as her body was clearly reacting to his, showing first signs of arousal. A tremor of lust ran down the Princess' spine when his strong hands bluntly caressed her female curves through the thick uniform. She could feel his body-heat and without breaking their kiss, he suddenly hoisted her up against the wall. Leia automatically wrapped her legs around his waist.  
_What was she doing?! Had she lost her mind?!_  
Their kiss became more passionate now, more vigorous and burned not only on her lips, for there was a treacherous fire spreading low in her stomach. Oh God...  
Involuntarily, the Princess remembered his naked figure and ran her hands through his dark hair, while a quiet moan escaped her lips - a tell-tale sign that slowly instincts were taking over.  
Leia had no idea how long they had been kissing, but at one point she felt his hot breath against her ear. "They are gone."  
Leia opened her eyes and then looked directly into his, cheeks flushed, lips swollen.  
_Sith, what had she done? She had..._  
"I...I...." She stuttered.  
He put a finger on her lips and led her slid down again.  
"In love and war there are no rules. You did what was necessary." He gave her a small smile. "And our strategy worked. Now, all we have to do is find Captain Solo."

***

Absentmindedly, Leia followed the Chiss through the next corridor, but her head was occupied by one thing only. The kiss they had shared. How could she have kissed him like that? Had it been because of the waterfall? She doubted it. She had seen attractive men before and yes, she had lusted for men before, but she had never acted like that! And she was in a relationship with Han! How could she have kissed him like that, how could she have wanted it like that?  
Was it perhaps because he had saved her life? Or due to their closeness and the fact that they had depended on each other and had learned to trust each other over the last couple of days that she had welcomed him with such open arms. And would, by implication, distance also cause her to rationalize and forget what had happened a couple of minutes ago? Yes, surely it would. It had to.  
And it was not like she had really wanted it. They had been forced to do it in order to not get noticed. She had not initiated it or ask for it! And she had done it for Han. To save the man she loved!  
That she had liked the kiss was bad, but also only a natural reaction. Men and women were, after all, biologically conditioned to enjoy it! It was programmed into each physical being, a subconscious, but very strong instinct to secure the survival of one's race. And the dangers they had faced here had probably heightened these instincts. Thrawn was strong and attractive. A leader and survivor. From a purely evolutionary point of view, a good breeding partner. And that was it. She did not care for Thrawn! She did not even like him! And she was most certainly not falling in love with him! This was stupid biology under extreme circumstances. Or was she just looking for excuses???

Leia almost bumped into Thrawn’s back and then looked up. They had arrived. The Slave 1 stood right before them.

TBC

A/N: And I have arrived too. I hope you enjoyed it. Quite a lot happened here and I’m too exhausted to proofread.


	8. Grand Admiral Thrawn

**A/N** : Warning: This chapter became a lot darker than intended. Dubious consent.

***

The door to the "Slave I" opened with a hiss and there was white steam coming out of it. Leia was the first to rush in. Thrawn followed with a drawn blaster.  
"Careful." He said, checking each and every corridor and control panel.  
After a while, he heard Leia's yells from downstairs.  
"Here! I have found him! I have found him! He's here!"

The frozen form of Han Solo hung like a painting on a wall.  
"We have to defreeze him!"  
Thrawn leaned in the doorway, a smug smile on his face.  
"Are you sure? I think I prefer him like this."  
"Of course I'm sure!" She touched on the controls and the "painting" crushed to the floor.  
"People have suffered from serious side effects after being frozen in carbonite. He could slow us down. Maybe we should wait and..."

But it was already too late. Leia had pushed the green button and slowly the grey carbonite shimmered in a blueish light, releasing at first Solo's face and hands and then the smuggler fell with a loud thud to the floor.  
Leia grabbed his hands and helped him back up. He was shivering all over.  
"Where am I? I can't see." He stuttered.  
"Who... who is there?"  
Leia held this head. Oh, Han! He couldn't see.  
"Someone who..." She saw Thrawn rolling his eyes. This idiot destroyed everything! She wanted to say "...loves you." But the kiss she had shared with the Chiss still burned on her lips.  
"... would never let you being shipped off to Jabba." She said instead.  
"Leia?! Is that really you?" His hands were running through thin air.  
"Where am I?"  
"On board the Slave I."  
Solo's head spun around.  
"Who is that?"  
"Commander Ceetan." Leia explained and looked up to Thrawn. "He's helping me to rescue you."  
"Th...thanks." Han stuttered. He was still freezing. Leia helped him up.  
"Come. I think I saw a med-corner with a blanket down that corridor."

Thrawn saw the two of them leaving and then made his way to the cockpit. He fell into the pilot's chair and activated the ship's computer. The repairs were almost done. Sublight and hyperdrive were online, the shields were at 70% and.... well, the laser cannons were offline. He skimmed through some of the files. Lord Vader had been very generous indeed. But why?  
Luke Skywalker... Skywalker.... Anakin Skywalker... a picture appeared in his head. A young man with blonde hair, wilding a lightsaber. Was there a connection? And who was Anakin Skywalker? His headache returned. With a sigh he leaned back and massaged this temples.

Suddenly Leia appeared.  
"And?" She inquired enthusiastically.  
"Defenceless, but the ship should have no trouble getting us out of here."  
"Great!" Leia jumped into the seat next to him.  
"We should leave then."  
"That is not how this works. We need security clearance first and I doubt we will get it like this."  
"And how do we get clearance?"  
Why did everything have to be so complicated?  
"I will get it."

***

It wasn't the first time he wore a Mandalorian armour. He was sure of it. It felt familiar.  
Another flashback: Him in a similar armour, firing a blaster at a group of humans.  
It was gone as soon as it had appeared. The intervals had become shorter today. He could only hope that that was a good sign.

A slightly overweight, bored Imperial in a black uniform sat behind a high up desk, looking down at whoever wanted something, while the HoloNews were flickering on a screen behind him.  
"And what can I do for you?" He asked and drank a sip of black coffee.  
"Security Clearance." Thrawn's distorted voice explained.  
"You want to leave?" The imperial looked closer at his screen. "Like that? The repairs aren't finished yet. Your ship's a sitting duck like this."  
"I did not ask for your opinion."  
The man shook his head.  
"Alright. Just saying. Let me get the papers." Swearing under his breath, the man left the office and Thrawn looked at the HoloScreen.

He almost forgot to breathe. There was a picture of him. 'Grand Admiral Thrawn missing for almost a week', was written underneath it. 'Captain Pellaeon is not open for comment'.  
The round face of an agreeable older man with a white mustache appeared on the screen. He knew that man...  
"Captain Pellaeon, is it true that the Grand Admiral has been kidnapped by the Rebels? Have there been ransom demands?"  
"No comment."  
"Captain Pellaeon, can you tell us about the circumstances of the Admiral's disappearance?"  
"For heaven's sake, get the media out of my sight. No comment. No comment to anything."  
GRAND ADMIRAL?! THRAWN? He worked for the Empire?!  
The headache suddenly became almost unbearable. Images came crashing down on him. Yes, his memory. It returned. A excruciatingly painful process, but a welcome one. Grand Admiral Thrawn...Yes, that name rang a bell.

The Imperial happily returned with the clearance form.  
"Please sign on the dotted line, Mr Fett."  
Thrawn did as the man had told him, took the clearance paper and then headed towards the door.  
"Have a nice day, Sir."  
"I will." He said threateningly.

***

The shower curtain opened with a loud thud and Leia turned around, afraid and shocked at the same time.  
"Ceetan?!"  
"Stop that farce!" He reached into the shower, turned it off and looked at her with a cold face and narrow eyes.  
Oh God. He remembered! She had hoped he would remember at some point. But she had also dreaded it, with good reason as she realised now.  
"I don't know what you are talking about," she said flatly and reached out for the towel, but he grabbed it roughly and threw it aside.  
"Think carefully, Princess because now is your chance to come clean. No pun intended, of course."  
He eyed her naked form from head to toe and Leia felt fear creeping up her tiny frame. This was not the man she had spend the last couple of days with. This was a Grand Admiral of the Galactic Empire and he was angry.  
Well sometimes, an attack was the best defense and so Leia took a step forward and bravely glared into his scarlet eyes.  
"Do you get off on this kind of thing? Approaching your naked, defenseless victims in the shower?"  
He didn't move an inch.  
"I am waiting for an explanation." He said coldly.  
"Fuck you!" Leia practically spat in his face.  
"With pleasure."  
He opened his jacket and threw it on top of her clothes, which lay neatly folded on top of a chair in the corner.  
"Have you lost your mind?!"  
"Oh...quite the contrary, Princess."  
She tried to leave and push through beside him, but he grabbed her forcefully and pushed her back into the shower. Her back crashed against the shower regulators, activating the shower once more. Thrawn advanced as quickly and swiftly as he did on the battlefield and claimed her mouth with a fierce kiss, while removing his shirt.  
Leia felt her back being pinned against the cold, tiled wall, whereas the Chiss' lips followed the stream of hot water from her jaw down to her neck to her tiny breasts and nipples, which he took into his mouth, sucking far too roughly.  
"Ahhh..." Leia screamed, somewhere between pleasure and pain.  
What was happening?  
He came back up and kissed her once more, deeply, hungrily, before leaning forward, hoarsely hissing into her ear...  
"On your knees."  
"What?" Leia opened her eyes and looked at him. Lines of water making it harder to look up. He tilted her chin and moves his thumb over her mouth.  
"From now on your pretty mouth will do better things than lying." There was a small smile on his face, condescending and full of lust at the same time.  
"I am...."  
"....at my mercy." He hissed and his eyes shown more brightly. "And if you behave, Princess. I will make sure that you are rewarded."  
"On your knees." He repeated, this time his voice darker, stronger. Implying that he would not be denied.  
He applied some pressure on her shoulders and Leia actually slowly knelt down.  
Heaven help. She had no idea how ....  
"What are you waiting for?"  
With trembling fingers, she unbuckled his belt, worked on the zipper and then freed the Chiss from his last garment.  
His cock was as perfect as the rest of him. Long and thick. It was sick that she liked it, but she couldn't help it. As in slow motion, Leia leaned forward and then carefully placed it into her mouth, sucking him ever so slowly.

She was inexperienced and by far not the best he had ever had, but the sight alone excited him and he couldn't take his eyes off her. The Chiss placed his hand on her head when she became better and sucked him with more vigour.  
"Enough." He groaned and breathed heavily, before pulling her back up.

Even though she had been the one giving him a blowjob, Leia was shaking all over. He would fuck her now. Here. In this shower. And a part of her wanted it. Longed for it.  
He kissed her and Leia groaned or growled, she didn't know, when he pressed his naked, wet body against hers.  
The shower was big enough for two, and for a second Leia was sure that it had been designed for humanoid sex because after he had lifted her left leg to his hip she had just pushed it against the opposite wall, which allowed him perfect access for what was to follow.  
His lips were demanding, as his tongue dived inside, exploring. It was as if he wanted to devour her whole and his hands had since moved to her waist while Leia's hand explored the muscles of his chest. He then moved his hands lower underneath her butt, bringing her into position. Apparently, the Chiss was in no mood to take it slow. He wanted her. Now.  
Leia hissed when she felt the tip of his penis at her entrance and suddenly she was afraid. She was on the pill, but she had never had sex without a condom before, but when he claimed her with one long, hard stroke, shoving through her swollen, wet flesh, Leia grasped and all thought left her mind.  
"Oh God!" She knocked her head against the wall.  
His hands squeezed her behind and kept her in place at the same time.  
"God? You still seem to have trouble with my name, Leia." He smiled and then he went in even deeper, if such a thing was possible. She winced.  
"Say it, Princess. Say my name. We do not want to get confused about who is fucking you, right?"  
Apparently, he was strong enough to hold her with just one arm as his right hand and suddenly caught her chin, forcing her to look up at him. Her eyes were so dark he could almost see himself in them. Her breath on his lips.  
"Say it."  
"Thrawn." She breathed and he kissed her deeply.  
"Louder."  
"Thrawn." His name on her lips opened up levels of unknown, dark passion. He grabbed her roughly and crushed into her over and over again and Leia felt her legs spreading even wider for him, moaning his name with each thrust. And that was all she could do, as the position she was in incapacitated her to meet his thrusts, she was forced to wait for him, to receive his cock in the way _he_ wanted it, the way _he_ liked it and her body was a willing participant, welcoming his rugged masculinity and strength. This was wrong. She should tell him to stop, instead she felt herself tightening around him.  
No! Yes! God, he felt so good inside her!  
When she came she nearly lost her balance and he felt her buckle from the spasms of pleasure.  
"Oooh God!"  
He pushed in, harder and harder, as he felt her flutter and clench around him, mercilessly thrusting inside her.  
He was dominating her, Leia realised somewhere in the back of her mind. He had been dominating her the whole time. Her breath was short and staggered. "Ahhh..."  
He prolonged her orgasm as long as he could and when he finally came he bit down on her neck in an act of primal pleasure, emptying himself deep inside her.  
Oh God! This was so wrong.  
He held her in place and they looked into each other's eyes for a second, which felt like an eternity.   
"I am glad you enjoyed it as much as I did."  
He intensified his grip on her ass and pushed in a little deeper for a final time. Leia closed her eyes and then heard a quiet, high-pitched moan leaving her mouth.  
"I know." He poured into her ear.  
Then he let her go, both standing directly under the steaming hot water, still breathing heavily, aching for one another.  
"I think you should attend to Captain Solo now. He is in need of some female care." He smiled down on her. "I am sure you agree that there is no need for him to know what happened here."  
Leia swallowed.  
"I do, Grand Admiral."

***

She sat next to Han and held this hand.  
"It's getting better, you know? At first, I only saw white and yellow dots, now I start to see shadows. I can see your frame too. Blurry, but I can see it."  
"That's good." Leia said, but her mind was somewhere else entirely. She had had sex with Thrawn and what would happen now?

The Slave I moved. Where were they going?! To the Empire... Leia was suddenly scared. Images of Vader torturing her on the Death Star appeared behind her eyes. Sith, there was a bounty on her head. She had been involved in stealing the Death Star plans, after all. What would they do to her? Torture? Public execution? She had to know. Leia squeezed Han's hand in a supporting gesture.  
"I'll be right back."

She walked into the cockpit, but it was empty.  
"Thrawn?"  
Leia rushed forward and checked the controls. The ship was flying on autopilot. Destination: Kessel.  
Oh, very funny!  
Where was he?  
"Thrawn?"

She searched every room, but he was gone. Why hadn't he brought her to the Emperor?  
He probably didn't consider them a threat. An ex-princess without any political or financial power and a blind smuggler with more luck than brains. The ransom was of no concern to him and somehow Leia was sure that he was one who kept his word. He had helped her to free Han.  
Leia sighed and sat down into the cockpits chair, changing their destination. Kessel. Well, in his view that was probably were they belonged.  
And she had to warn her friends. Thrawn had had a good inside in the Rebel Alliance in the short time he had been with them. How she hated Madine. What a fool!

Leia typed in a hyperspace frequency.  
"This is Princess Leia... to everyone who can hear me on this frequency. You have to leave immediately. I repeat: You have to leave immediately. The Empire has knowledge of your whereabouts and is probably already on its way. Leave immediately. Leave immediately. Princess Organa, out."

She could only hope that she hadn't been too late.

***

YEARS LATER - AFTER "THE LAST JEDI"

Leia remembered it like it had been yesterday. She had never talked about it to anyone and it had haunted her for a long, long time. At first she had told herself that it had been rape, but now, that she was older and wiser, she knew that was not true. She had never said "no", she had never even tried to resist. She had kissed him back, she had pushed her leg up against the other wall. She had wanted it and, as Thrawn had rightly stated, she had enjoyed it. To be sexually dominated was something she had neither experienced before, nor after. No one would have dared...Except him. Leia had felt used and humiliated and at the same time it had excited her like nothing else. For quite some time, he had been the intimate enemy that had made her come night after night in her dreams and she had hated him for it and she had hated herself even more. Learning that Vader was her biological father had been another blow. Thrawn and Vader, two sides of a coin? Had her tainted blood called out for the devil with the red eyes? Had the Skywalker in her wanted it? Was she a bad person for enjoying it?  
But that had been a long time ago. Lots of things had happened and now, everything was calm and much more balanced. Otherwise, she could never have come here. Still, talking to him, after so many years felt unreal and.... strange.

"And of all the people the Resistance sends the mother of madness?" He threw a file on the shiny, black table and then sat down in the chair opposite of her. He was referring to Kylo Ren, her son, the self-proclaimed leader of the First Order, the killer of her husband, Han Solo. Was he mad? Sometimes it felt like it.  
"It wasn't my choice."  
"Well, there we have something in common." He skipped through the folder. "We should never have defreezed Solo."  
"You are talking about my husband."  
"Late husband." He corrected. Then he looked up at her. "But then again, there are lot of things we should not have done." He might be retired now, but the former Grand Admiral hadn't forgotten how to kill.  
"I'm not here to talk about the past. The First Order, it has to be stopped."  
"The Chiss Ascendancy will not interfere with your problem with the First Order as it will not interfere with any acts of violence outside its borders. The Chiss are peaceful people and use violence only to defend themselves." It sounded like something they told him to say. Like a written down law. And it did not sound like Thrawn at all.  
"Your problem?" Leia repeated unbelievable. "Thrawn, don't make it sound like you're a peace-loving, uninvolved outsider. You lived and breathed the Empire. And you lived among humans for quite some time. Don't tell me you're indifferent to the First Order."  
"I am not indifferent, Leia. But I am talking on behalf of the Chiss."  
"Then why did they send you?"  
"Because I knew your galaxy, your people and your language like no other of my kind."  
"Yes, you do and therefore you have to understand how dangerous the First Order is! They won't stop after the Core, your people might be next, but if we..."  
He held up a hand and silently shook his head.  
"I have tried, Leia. As I said, I'm not indifferent."  
Leia's mind was on fire. She couldn't have come in vain. They needed help or the galaxy would burn.  
"What about you? You alone, you on our side. You are a brilliant strategist. You could make a difference."  
He sighed and looked out of the viewport.  
"Perhaps, but what you are offering is the choice between a rock and a hard place... and I am tired of fighting."  
Leia looked at him. There were streaks of light-blue in his otherwise still dark hair and there were more lines around the eyes. Yes, he had grown older, but he still was a picture of a man: Tall, strong, well-built, angular face, strong jawline... No wonder she had fallen so easily for him in her youth. No, he was older...but not that old.  
"You? I doubt it."  
"Yet, it is true. Many men have given their lives under my command, for what?"  
"That's why you must fight, you..."  
"I do not believe in the Resistance, Leia."  
"But you said that you're not indifferent! Then, what do you want?"  
He raised an eyebrow.  
"What do I want? The galaxy has never cared for what I want. Skywalkers, on the other hand, tend to be more lucky in that regard."  
Leia was silent for a while.  
"Do you think this..." Leia made a striking gesture. "...is what I wanted? The Empire blew up the only family I ever knew, together with my home planet, I killed my biological mother coming into this world and my father was a Sith Lord who tortured me, my marriage went down the drains, my political opponents ate me alive when my true parentage was revealed, my brother is dead, my son fell to the Dark Side and he killed his own father." She laughed a humourless laugh. "Vader couldn't kill Luke, but Ben didn't even hesitate. He looked him in the eye and killed him. Do you think that is what I wanted? The galaxy doesn't give a damn about what I want! You are not the only one who had his wishes denied." Leia felt tears in her eyes. God, she wouldn't cry now, would she? That surely would not impress him.  
"I am sorry." To Leia's surprise, she felt his hand on hers. "But what I want would hurt you even more."  
"What do you want?" She asked quietly.  
"I want Kylo Ren dead." Leia tried to pull her hand away, but he kept it in place. "Your son has to die. Deep down you must know that. And so must General Hux and his followers. They are mad and have far too much power."  
"People said the same about you."  
"I am sure they did and many other things, but Leia... fighting the New Order and wishing for your son to see his mistakes and to return to you, that is wishful thinking."  
"Let me wish, but let us fight, Thrawn. Together. Let us force the galaxy into compliance. Just this once."  
Leia looked at their hands. How Strange... Here they were, intimate enemies, reunited to for a new beginning?

THE END

 **A/N:** This turned out TOTALLY different from the original plan.... Still, I hope you like it!


End file.
